what if you were in bed tonight and you were really lonely and sad and you were lying with your arm hanging out over the edge of the bed into the darkness and just as you were going to sleep, the darkness reached out and held your hand
i made a thing
i don’t think i’m as freaked out by the dark anymore
this is how i go to sleep every night.
Today’s Gender of the day is: Trashed by a lady cyclist, who is noted for her athletic powers.
Why was Oedipus against profanity?
Because he kisses his mother with that mouth.
I’m getting really tired of these motherfucking jokes.
why you should be my friend
- I will talk about sex with you and not care in the slightest even if you have the most bizarre kinks I do not give a shit
- I will reblog your selfies no questions asked
- I will ask you questions on anon to make you look more popular
- nothing happens to me so you can talk about yourself forever.
wonder if I’m going to heaven or hell, but it can’t be heaven because I’m already in hell
i hate it when ppl try to shit on my ships by saying “WELL IT’S UNHEALTHY” like son why do you think i’m even HERE
Bless whoever made this.
i just said hi to someone and they didn’t hear me i’m never trying that again
*says i dont care* *actually does tho*
I THREW A GRAPE IN THE AIR TO CATCH IT IN MY MOUTH BUT IT WENT TOO HIGH AND HIT THE CEILING AND THERE WAS A SPIDER THERE AND THE SPIDER FELL AND SO DID THE GRAPE AND THEY BOTH LANDED ON MY FACE AND I STILL HAVEN’T STOPPED SCREAMING
i read the first line in my head in the tune of call me maybe im so stupid
I threw a grape in the air
I went to catch it I swear
It hit a spider that fell
and now they’re on my face
This is how fucking stupid you sound when you say, ‘No homo.’
You’re not that scary.
Well, here’s a picture of your grandma’s feet!
Oh, darn it!
you know you’ve seen that show too many times when you read all that in their voices.